浅显易懂的英语笑话阅读
① 求两个英语小笑话(50个词左右,要浅显易懂的)
一外教教小朋友一个单词cat,老师让小朋友猜猜是什么,老师说:"它每天喜欢躺在炕头,睡觉的时候还打呼噜,有个小朋友站起来说:“那是我爷爷。”
Little
Robert
asked
his
mother
for
two
cents.
"What
did
you
do
with
the
money
I
gave
you
yesterday?"
"I
gave
it
to
a
poor
old
woman,"
he
answered.
"You're
a
good
boy,"
said
the
mother
proudly.
"Here
are
two
cents
more.
But
why
are
you
so
interested
in
the
old
woman?"
"She
is
the
one
who
sells
the
candy."
② 5个四年级上册小学生浅显易懂的英语小笑话
The Perfect Son.
A: I have the perfect son.
B: Does he smoke?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: Does he drink whiskey?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: Does he ever come home late?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he?
A: He will be six months old next Wednesday.
完美儿子
A:我有一个很完美的儿子.
B:他抽烟吗?
A:不抽.
B:他喝威士忌酒吗?
A:不喝.
B:他会不会很晚回家?
A:不会.
B:我想你确实有一个完美儿子. 那他多大了?
A:下个星期三就满6个月了.
Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”
“她是个卖糖果的。”
I've Just Bitten My Tongue
"Are we poisonous?" the young snake asked his mother.
"Yes, dear," she replied - "Why do you ask?"
"Cause I've just bitten my tongue! "
我刚咬破自己的舌头
“我们有毒吗?”一个年幼的蛇问它的母亲。
“是的,亲爱的,”她回答说,“你问这个干什么?”
“因为我刚刚咬破自己的舌头。”
Jane:mom,what's the meaning of angel?
Mom:angel is a kind of person who can fly and with wing.
Jane:but miss helen can't fly,but why did dad call her "my angle"?
Mom(with angry):really?oh,I will let her fly at once!
简:妈妈,天使是什么意思?
妈妈:天使是一种有翅膀,会飞的人.
简:但是海伦小姐不会飞,爸爸为什么叫她"我的天使"呢?
妈妈(气愤地):真的?好,我马上就叫她飞!
A: I saw seven girls share one umbrella and none of them got wet.
B: Oh, that must be a very big umbrella.
A: No, it wasn’t raining.
A:我看见7个女孩共撑一把伞却没有一个被淋湿。
B:啊?那一定是把很大的伞吧!
A:不是,当时并没有下雨。
③ 英语笑话故事,有些内涵,浅显易懂。
He Won
Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.
Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?
Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.
他赢了
汤姆:约翰尼,你小弟弟好吗?
约翰尼:他害病卧床了。他受了伤。
汤姆:真糟糕,怎么回事儿?
约翰尼:我们做游戏,看谁能把身子探出窗外最远,他赢了。
I Have His Ear in My Pocket
Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
他的耳朵在我衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?”
“一个男孩咬了我一口,”伊凡说。
“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。
“他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”
A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”
“她是个卖糖果的。”
Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"
醉酒
一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄,老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道:“爸爸,‘醉’字是什么意思?” “唔,孩子,”父亲回答说,“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个,那么我就算醉了。” “可是,爸爸, ”孩子说,“那儿只有一个警察呀!”
Hospitality
The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.
好客
由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时,家里没有奶酪了,于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿,他拿着一片奶酪回到房间,把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说:“孩子,你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪?” “在捕鼠夹上,先生。”那小男孩说。
英语小笑话
上个星期五我穿了一件 Adidas 的衣服去打球, 一个老美看到就笑我说, "Do you
know what does it mean? It means All Day I Dream About Sex.我整天都在想著
性, 缩写正好是 Adidas) " 我正惊讶他怎么反应这么快, 联想力这么丰富时,旁边的
一个老美帮我解围, 他说, 有一个很著名的合唱团 Korn, 他们的招牌歌之一就是
A.D.I.D.A.S, (All day I dream about sex)所以呢,这个典故可是很多老美都耳熟
能详的喔! 下次就换你去取笑老美了.
A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second"
一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.他问:"主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又问:"且话偻蚰昴?"上帝说:"一秒钟."最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"上帝回答:"过一秒钟."
1,Two birls
Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?
Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.
Teacher: Please tell us.
Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.
两只鸟
老师: 这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子,哪只是麻雀吗?
学生:我指不出,但我知道答案。
老师:请说说看。
学生:燕子旁边的就是麻雀,麻雀旁边的就是燕子。
2. The Fish Net
"Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?"
"A lot of little holes tied together with strings." replied the little girl.
鱼网
"你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗,安?" 老师发问道。
"把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。" 小女孩回答道。
3. The New Teacher
George comes from school on the first of September.
"George, how did you like your new teacher?" asked his mother.
"I didn\'t like her, Mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too....."
新老师
9月1日, 乔治放学回到家里。
"乔治,你喜欢你们的新老师吗?" 妈妈问。
"妈妈,我不喜欢,因为她说3加3得6, 可后来又说2加4也得6。"
4. A physics Examination
Once in a physics examination, Nick finished the first question very soon, while his classmates were thinking it hard.
The question was: When it thunders why do we see the lighting first, then hear the thunderrolls?
Nick\'s answer: Because our eyes are before ears.
一次物理考试
在一次物理考试时,当同学们都还在苦思冥想时,尼克很快就答好了第一个问题。
这个问题是:为什么在打雷时,我们总是先看到闪电后听到雷声?
尼克的回答是:因为眼睛在前,耳朵在后。
Jim’s History Examination
Uncle: How did Jim do in his history examination?
Mother: Oh, not at all well, but there, it wasn't his fault. They asked him
things that happened before the poor boy was born.
吉姆的历史考试
舅舅:吉姆这孩子历史考得怎么样?
母亲:唉,糟透了。可话又说回来,这也不能怪他。嗨,他们尽问一些这个
可怜的孩子出生前的事儿。
④ 求几篇简短易懂的英语笑话! 大概读出来要1分钟左右,初三水平谢谢
The teacher asked,'Give me an example of Coincidence?'
Student replied,My mom and dad got married on the same date.
Teacher:How old is your dad.
Student:He is as old as I am.
Teacher:How is it possible?
Student:Because he became a dad only after I was born.
TEACHER :Give me a sentence starting with "I".
Student:I is...
TEACHER :No.Always say,"I am."
Student:All right..."I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
Teacher:Suppose,I give you 2 dogs.Then I again give you 2 dogs.How many will you have?
Student:5
Teacher:How?
Student:I have a dog in my house now
Teacher:You promised me to submit me a paragraph,right?
Student:Yes Sir.
Teacher:And I also promised that if you fail to submit it,I will punish you,right?
Student:Yes Sir,so it will be fair if you break your promise too.
⑤ 几个词的 浅显易懂的 三年级能看懂的英语小笑话
A:Armstrongwent(go的过去式)tothemoon,thatgreat!
B:That'snothing,myfatherwenttothesun!
A:Thesun?It'sveryhot!
B:That'sdoesn'tmatter.Hewenttothereatnight!
参考译文:A:阿姆斯特朗去过月球,真棒!
B:这不算什么,我爸去过太阳!
A:太阳?那很热啊!
B:没关系,他晚上去那儿!
⑥ 有没有浅显易懂的英语笑话
He Won Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself. Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen? Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won. 他赢了 汤姆:约翰尼,你小弟弟好吗? 约翰尼:他害病卧床了。他受了伤。 汤姆:真糟糕,怎么回事儿? 约翰尼:我们做游戏,看谁能把身子探出窗外最远,他赢了。 I Have His Ear in My Pocket Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?" "A kid bit me," replied Ivan. "Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother. "I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket." 他的耳朵在我衣兜里 伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?” “一个男孩咬了我一口,”伊凡说。 “再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。 “他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。” A Good Boy Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?" "I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered. "You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?" "She is the one who sells the candy." 好孩子 小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。 “昨天给你的钱干什么了?” “我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?” “她是个卖糖果的。” Drunk One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk." "But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!" 醉酒 一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄,老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道:“爸爸,‘醉’字是什么意思?” “唔,孩子,”父亲回答说,“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个,那么我就算醉了。” “可是,爸爸, ”孩子说,“那儿只有一个警察呀!” Hospitality The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy. 好客 由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时,家里没有奶酪了,于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿,他拿着一片奶酪回到房间,把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说:“孩子,你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪?” “在捕鼠夹上,先生。”那小男孩说。 英语小笑话 上个星期五我穿了一件 Adidas 的衣服去打球, 一个老美看到就笑我说, "Do you know what does it mean? It means All Day I Dream About Sex.我整天都在想著 性, 缩写正好是 Adidas) " 我正惊讶他怎么反应这么快, 联想力这么丰富时,旁边的 一个老美帮我解围, 他说, 有一个很著名的合唱团 Korn, 他们的招牌歌之一就是 A.D.I.D.A.S, (All day I dream about sex)所以呢,这个典故可是很多老美都耳熟 能详的喔! 下次就换你去取笑老美了. A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second" 一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.他问:"主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又问:"且话偻蚰昴?"上帝说:"一秒钟."最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"上帝回答:"过一秒钟." 1,Two birls Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which? Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer. Teacher: Please tell us. Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow. 两只鸟 老师: 这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子,哪只是麻雀吗? 学生:我指不出,但我知道答案。 老师:请说说看。 学生:燕子旁边的就是麻雀,麻雀旁边的就是燕子。 2. The Fish Net "Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?" "A lot of little holes tied together with strings." replied the little girl. 鱼网 "你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗,安?" 老师发问道。 "把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。" 小女孩回答道。 3. The New Teacher George comes from school on the first of September. "George, how did you like your new teacher?" asked his mother. "I didn\'t like her, Mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too....." 新老师 9月1日, 乔治放学回到家里。 "乔治,你喜欢你们的新老师吗?" 妈妈问。 "妈妈,我不喜欢,因为她说3加3得6, 可后来又说2加4也得6。" 4. A physics Examination Once in a physics examination, Nick finished the first question very soon, while his classmates were thinking it hard. The question was: When it thunders why do we see the lighting first, then hear the thunderrolls? Nick\'s answer: Because our eyes are before ears. 一次物理考试 在一次物理考试时,当同学们都还在苦思冥想时,尼克很快就答好了第一个问题。 这个问题是:为什么在打雷时,我们总是先看到闪电后听到雷声? 尼克的回答是:因为眼睛在前,耳朵在后。 Jim’s History Examination Uncle: How did Jim do in his history examination? Mother: Oh, not at all well, but there, it wasn't his fault. They asked him things that happened before the poor boy was born. 吉姆的历史考试 舅舅:吉姆这孩子历史考得怎么样? 母亲:唉,糟透了。可话又说回来,这也不能怪他。嗨,他们尽问一些这个 可怜的孩子出生前的事儿。
⑦ 求两个英语小笑话(50个词左右,要浅显易懂的)万分感谢了
Before the final examination, Tom told his mother, "Mom, I had a dream last night that I'd passed today's exam.""Don't trust dreams, dear. It is said what you experience in dreams usually turns out to be the opposite." Mother replied."Then I do hope I'll fail the other subjects in my dream tonight," Tom said.
在期末考试之前,汤姆告诉他的母亲:“妈妈,我昨天晚上做了一个梦,梦见我通过了今天的考试。”“不要相信梦,亲爱的。据说梦中的经历通常与现实相反。”妈妈答道。“那么,我真希望在今晚的梦中,我的其他功课都不及格。”汤姆说。
An old lady who was very deaf and who thought everything too dear, went into a shop and asked the shopman:' How much this stuff?'
'Seven dollars, Madam, it is very cheap.'
The lady said, 'It is too much, give it to me for fourteen.'
'I did not say seventeen dollars, but seven.'
'It is still too much,' replied the old lady, 'give it to me for five.'
一位耳聋并且总是嫌东西太贵的老太太走进一家商店。 她问店员:“这东西要多少钱?”
“七美元,太太,这是很便宜的。”
老太太说:“太贵了,十四美元差不多。”
店员忙说:“我没说十七美元,是七美元。”
“还是太贵,”老太太说:“五美元,我就买啦。”
⑧ 一些简单易懂的英文笑话,最好是短一点的!谢谢了~~!!
一人考驾驶执照
考官坐他旁边
到了一个转弯的地方,他不知道是转哪边
他问考官:“turn left?”
考官说:“right!”
他马上往右转
Let me take it down
An elephant said to a mouse ,"no doubt that you are the smallest znd most useless thing that Ihave e ver seen ."
"Pless ,say it again .Let me take it down ."the mouse said ."I will tell a flea what I know."
为我所用
一头大象对一只小老鼠说:“你无疑是我见过的最小、最没用的东西。”
“请再说一遍,让我把它记下来。”老鼠说。“我要讲给我认识的一只跳蚤听。
An Artist
An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on display at that time.
"I have good news and bad news," the owner replied. "The good news is that a gentleman enquired about your work and
wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told him it would, he bought all 15 of your paintings."
"That's wonderful," the artist exclaimed. "What's the bad news?"
"He was your doctor."
⑨ 急需一则简短的英语笑话,简明易懂的
I don't even know that woman 我又不认识那个女人 A couple walking in the park noticed a young man and woman siting on a bench, passionately kissing. "Why don't you do that?" said the wife. "Honey," replied her husband, "I don't even know that woman!" 中文 : 一对在公园散步的夫妇注意到坐在长凳上的那对年轻男女正在热烈地接吻。 “为什么你不能那样做呢?”妻子说。 “亲爱的,”她丈夫回答,“我又不认识那个女人!” Who do you think you are? 你以为你是谁? Who do you think you are ? The bus was crowded, and as one more man tried to get on, the passengers wouldn’t let him aboard. It is too crowded, they shouted. who do you think you are? I am the driver. he said. 你以为你是谁 ? 公共汽车上很挤,当又一个人还是试图上车时,乘客们不让他上。 车上太挤了,他们喊道,你以为你是谁? 我是司机!他说。 A note: aboard: adv.在船(飞机、车)上, 上船(飞机、车)prep.在(船、飞机、车)上, 上(船、飞机、车). on board:到船上, 在船上 go aboard: 上船 (上飞机等) All aboard! 请上船[飞机、车],都上来! 我从英语笑话网里找的,不满意的话,你可以进去看看,多的要死 http://www.yingyuxiaohua.com/